Saturday, October 15, 2011

How can she slap II

A couple of Christopher Street lesbians biting off more than they can chew.

The expression is beyond cliche because countless hip hop jams have a " fuckin' with the wrong nigga..." sample. Yeah, well, they thought they caught a vic, but the vic caught a vic.

Stick to nibbling on clits, love. As Charlie Murphy explained, you don't slap a man. You start fucking with the big boys, keepin' it real is going to go wrong on you at some point.

One might say, how were they to know they were fucking with an ex-con (who, seemingly, had a little pent up frustration)...exactly my point. Even if the were that one to steal on, to let slide a woman who raised his hand to him, they should've quit while they were ahead. Once they went behind the counter, it was on.

I expect that they'll drop the charges against the cashier.

Anybody who has had to drive across Christopher Street in the wee hours knows WTF Bokolis is talking about. Christopher Street is on Bokolis' route home- actually, it's on my route to Joe's Pizza, which will bring me to another, related story- from the fun job. As to the people who hang on Christopher Street at that time, their self-perception of their level of toughness is too high for their own good and, as a result, they are way too obnoxious for their own good (just like these two). They cross against the light on Bleecker and often hang in the crosswalk, just because they can, which bottles up traffic. Being held up in traffic at 1, 2 in the morning will fuck with a New Yorker's head. If I thought it was worth the effort, Bokolis would get out and throw a couple of these muthafuckas through a storefront. I don't think it's that much of a longshot to speculate that these two have, at some point, blocked my path to Joe's.

Which brings me to an episode that happened a few Pride days ago. Getting to Joe's after the fun job wasn't an issue. But, the array of people typically on that block is not there. It's like 11PM, the block is filled with people, milling around, people who would otherwise be on Christopher Street, people who just don't have a feel of the right time to call it a night. I want pizza, I don't care. I turn into Joe's and, within a tenth of a second, my hood sense starts tingling. The place has that air of a place that's about to get out of control.

Sure enough shit, not 30 seconds later, right in front of me (Joe's- the new Joe's, not the old one on the corner- is small), one bird is talking to another bird. No loudness, no build-up...crack! right hand, down she goes. Two other birds start stomping the fallen bird, blood starts flowing. The thought came to me that I should step outside, as I was between the door and the fight, leaving myself open to the odd limp-wristed fucker deciding to throw a knife into the mix. Narcissistic as I am, I'm thinking, this is all I need, to have one of these muthafuckas make me famous and to wind up as their martyr or some shit. I want some pizza, I don't care, and only back up enough as to not get hit with a follow-through or stray.

The cops come through about 30 seconds after the stomp-out and clear the place out. Because I want to see the bitter end of this- and because I want pizza, I don't care- I stand outside. To put it mildly, the cops didn't exercise great care in removing the fallen and bloodied bird from the place. Some other bird started wailing, "They washed her!" a couple of times. I've yet to determine to exactly what that slang pertains, but I gather it has something to do with picking her up by her legs, grinding her face into the floor; push-pulling her as if she were lodged against something; dragging her out by her feet whilst banging her head into every possible obstacle on the way out; once outside, tilting her so as to get that little extra leverage so that her face gets that extra scrape against the concrete.

They ignored the perpetrators, who hadn't left. I don't know where they dumped her, because I turned around to see the Blue Wall coming. It occurred to me that I wasn't getting any pizza.

At first, the wall didn't live up to its legend, as half those cops seemed drunk and allowed me to walk (towards my car) right through them...maybe they were sympathetic because I don't exactly look like the others. Before I reached my car, I notice that, in the space of about a minute, they had cleared out all the derelicts and the block again looked like any other night, tourists, locals and drunk white girls with a craving. The guy was still mopping up the blood when I walked in.

I got my pizza...all's well that ends well.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Spreading some love...

...for Ultragrrrl. I go over for my dose of happy music; shit that keeps the party movin'. Hey, I've got to keep up with the kids. But, popular culture is not Bokolis' thing; I cant keep track of the mainstream stuff, much less the diggin' in the crates catalogues goodness. She's got the lock-down on that.

Now this here was touched by her magic wand. It reminded Bokolis of a couple of nipple bump parties from back in the day. I don't recall getting home from those parties. I still have my kidneys and my pucker, so I only had to dust my shoulder.

I had to suspend disbelief for some shit. This only happens to Bokolis when I use the green Axe. The yellow one brings muted results and the red is like repellent. And, the part about the Mexicans, after KTFO'ing him, driving him home is total bullshit. In reality, his pucker would have been ruined.

They were dead on about the blue one. The one time I used it, I also wound up wearing a snout...and it might have been the same bird.

Here's to more nipple bump parties, even if I'm not attending.

Now that they've worked out this lockout...

...bullshit, the chumps at the "worldwide leader" have material for their first C'mon, man" segment. The Oakland Raiders present to you, Susie Sanchez

C'mon man. They didn't even try to 'shop this broad. Bokolis was going to say that I know loads of 37 year old birds that are fitter than this one, but none of them are mothers, let alone grandmothers. Was that supposed to be a draw?

I suppose the old man's taste in birds is running parallel to Hugh Hefner's- I hear they're giving horses the centerfold these days. Either that, or he's watching way too much MILF* porn.

*Bokolis' definition of MILF requires that, the mother is at least 35 and, if she has less than three kids, one of them is at least 12 years old. A 30-year old toting around a 4-year old isn't a MILF.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Just who's fault is this anyway

As we watch our politicians play gay chicken with our nation's debt rating, I have to wonder how the hell we got to the point where the Alpha Betas are running things. Howthefuck did we get to the point where we've allowed a bunch of people who blatantly demonstrate that they don't give a dead rat's asshole about us are leading us?

We're not going to really blame this on the partisan nonsense because we put them in position to do this. We must look within for the answer. Life is about you vs. you, not you vs. them. The " the people..." as government, even if forgotten, is apropos, as this is our own doing.

By being asleep at the switch and neglecting our civic duties in favor of monetary enrichment (which is a vicious circle, as the scumbags serve as our role models), we've allowed for the rise of the military apparatus, the empowerment of the corporate entity at the expense of the rights human entity.

We've allowed ourselves to be dumbed down, to accept the Readers Digest version of things for the sake of convenience, to the point where we are incapable of confronting and processing reality. Our minds are not sharp, and we have frames to match. What betterment of body and mind we do pursue, we pursue for self, for primarily personal gain, whether it be to outrun the next guy, to self-medicate, just to feel good or to score a piece of ass.

I don't feel like listing examples here. I'm not an accountant, so I don't record history. I simply retain the parts that interest me and hope that my mind does not distort it too much. It's enough for me to say that, with all the information available (even if it creates a poverty of attention), for me to encounter so many dull minds is as saddening as it is draining.

Bokolis can say that, like- I assume- most people, I'm liberal about some things and conservative about some things. I'd like to think I possess enough logic to form cogent views about matters and do not ascribe to any party's line because in many, if not most circumstances, your ideology is to your detriment.

As I generally avoid imposing my will on people (ostensibly because I'm self-abosrbed, but really because I'm afraid of wielding that much power), I quash others' attempts to impose their will upon me. Because, if Bokolis were in charge, you can be damned sure that I'd impose my will upon everybody (until they eventually clipped me). It wouldn't be because I'd be a mad tyrant...I've been convinced for some time now that shit has gotten so bad that things can no longer be fixed by political process.

Can you imagine you were in charge and that, whenever you did something, no matter how noble your intentions, you had half the populace pissed as hell at you?

The noble person would eventually quit in disgust.

Some of us who swear they can catch him would chase the leprechaun. If they don't get clipped, they eventually get marginalized.

Some of us would stand up to the apparatus. Those guys get clipped for sure.

Then there are the street-level guys that will not only stand up to the apparatus, they'll harness others' rage. If they have back, those guys are the dangerous ones. They probably don't give a fuck about the cause; they love power and a good fight (beatdown).

It's muthafuckas like this that are most likely to change the world. Unfortunately, they are only fit to destroy and dominate, not to lead. Once a guy like this gets into power, it just becomes a new type of misery.

When Bokolis was in Spain this Spring, I encountered peaceful protests (I didn't hear much about this in the American MSM, BTW) regarding the people's plight in this global financial seizure (es una estafa). Their Madrid base camp (I had two separate one-day stints in Madrid) happened to be about a ~10 minute walk from my hotel.

Aside- while the government declared the base camp- in a public square- illegal, they sent sanitation to clean up after them. There were no police.

The first time, I went down dolo. I'm bouncing around, listening and taking it all in. It's (probs jobless) people sitting around speaking; no vitriol, no loudness even. It had the impression of a tourist colony.

Next time through, I linked up with one of my Madrid contacts (American friend who I know from here) to mix it up with them. Bokolis' Spanish is functional, but not good enough for high-level conversation necessary to get across my points. The gist is that, while I don't necessarily agree with their views, I'm glad they are doing this.

Ultimately, I'm as guilty as anyone else. While Bokolis placed in the money at Carlito's angles tournament, I don't lay it on the line to stand up to these muthafuckas, resolving instead to snatching up those nickels before the steamroller gets them. Aside from being relatively comfortable, because I need convenience like everyone else, I don't have time to do the dissident's 5-year bid. I want the revolution fermented and ready to go so I can jump in it.

Ignorant as I am, I thought I may have my chance. I asked if they were ever going to storm the castle or some shit. When told no, I wished them luck and bounced.

That's all the fuck I got.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Rugby for fairies...The Big Game in Big D

Packers (-3) over Steelers - You can still find -2.5, but you'd have to lay odds. If you were smart enough to snag the early -2.5, or even the opening -2.0, you should just go shopping for a +3.5 spread and hope to hit the middle. In fact, Bokolis found 7.5-1 for the game landing on the number. I don't know if that's a good price but, at 8-3, it's worth putting up a little piece of the built up powder.

If you simply must take sides, the pundits have been at it for a fortnight. I'm putting stock in playoff performance and Rodgers' numbers in ideal conditions, and downplaying all of this supposed experience.

In the same breath used to talk up Ruthlessbuggerer as potential legend with a third ring, the pundits also explain that he doesn't have to play well for the Steelers to win...some legend. They ignore that, against relatively weak opposition, he didn't do all that much to win the two he's got. Yes, I remember the final drive against Arizona. What I don't remember is seeing Santonio Holmes' second foot come down inbounds.

Therein lies the rub. All things being equal, the Packers should smoke the Steelers. But, when the Steelers are playing, all things aren't always equal. It's one thing for them to get the calls against the Seahawks and the Cardinals. They shouldn't get them against the Packers.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

What's his armband say now?

Fernando Torres finally got his not-so-secret wish and was shipped off to Chelski FC. Liverpool received- latest figure- 50 million quid, which they pissed away on Luis "Handball" Suarez, formerly of ajax, and Andy Carroll, formerly of Newcastle United.

Still ain't got no history, muthafuckas. That pic is owned or some shit by Getty Images...please don't hurt me.

After that move in the World Cup, it is distasteful to Bokolis to have a rat like Suarez on the team. It will pain me to cheer his goals...if he actually scores any, that is.

Carroll, I'm told, is currently the third leading scorer in the EPL. I'm told. He did it for Newcastle, which means he's unproven. Further, for 35 million quid, there surely was higher quality- both skill and star- to obtain.

Anyway, about Torres...this move has got Liverpool supporters burning his shirt. Those who do so ignore that they are burning the crest on the front as well as the name on the back.

Of course, getting worked up- as if Torres is committing some footballing crime by daring to leave the great Liverpool FC- is silliness. The shirt burners are the people who deluded themselves by clinging to the “armband” and thinking Torres was anything more than a hot, but high-maintenance girlfriend, who's a hot, but twice-a-month lay.

Facing a second year without Champions League football and the minimum 20 million quid that comes with it, Liverpool wanted to ship him out as much as Torres wanted to leave. The club was, it seems, smart enough to sell the highs.

His departure is part of the cleansing process. That means the fans should get over it...well, get over it after the upcoming match with Chelski. You know what will help: helping the rent boys come up with a chant. They usually have to resort to corrupting our chants as it is. Why not do it for them?

A chequebook turned him Red to blue,
We sang him but we always knew,
The 50 mil to Liverpool,
Show Chelski are the bigger fool,
Liverpool Number Nines!

It’s going to hurt far more if/when Stevie G leaves before anyone from the youth system develops into the role...there's Rafa still paying dividends.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

Free at last?

Well, well, well. It appears our boys the Wilpons haven't been entirely honest about their dealings with Bernie Madoff. In response to being sued by those trying to claw back profits from Madoff's imploded operation, Fred Wilpon is offering up a minority stake, probably 20% - 25%, in the New York Mets.

That pic is owned, or something, by AP. Please don't hurt me.

The whisper number on the amount sought by the lawyers is...pinky to mouth...$1 Billion. As it goes, all profits from a scheme such as Madoff was orchestrating are deemed illegitimate, regardless of whether the person profiting knew about the scheme, and can be clawed back. That, as it turns out, is even better than if Madoff had beaten Wilpon for half a billion. In that scenario, Wilpon would already be bottomed out and could possibly be looking forward to recovery.

So, how much of Wilpon's stash is at stake? The story goes that Wilpon had money with Madoff for at least 25 years. Madoff was dumping close to 2% yield into these accounts every month. That shit adds up, so it's not unreasonable to believe that the Wilpons could have cashed out several hundred millions of dollars. Given that Madoff professed to being a life-long Mets fan, it is not unreasonable to speculate that, Madoff craved access to the team/ownership, Wilpon's rate of return was just a bit sweeter than everybody else's and, even if not, he probably got to cash out easier than everybody else.

Regardless, this means that Wilpon, like it wasn't blatantly obvious, was less than honest about what effect his dealings with Madoff have had on the Mets. He bullshitted y'all so he could get y'all to buy overpriced tickets to pay for his new ballpark. Bokolis wasn't having any of that shit; I've never been inside the new place and didn't pay more than $5 for a ticket at the dump in the final six years of its existence. I'd taken comped tickets to the Dump in that time frame, but won't even do that to go to this ad-infested bomb shelter. This, from a guy who gets to 3-4 major league parks and as many minor league parks each year.

As Bokolis chronicled, Wilpon first bought into the team in 1980. He acquired enough to put his dirty mitts on the team in early 1986, first applied said dirty mitts after the 1986 season (notice that the Mets haven't won since), and bought out Doubleday in 2002, assuming full control. He promptly installed his boy, Jeff Wilpon, to run the club...shit has been mostly disastrous ever since. Urban legend has it that Doubleday said that Jeff Wilpon would turn out to be a colossal fucking embarrassment. Perhaps that is why he sold- to wash his hands.

This Madoff caper lingers while, Wilpon, being in the commercial real estate business, has seen that portion of his wealth take a haircut. So, in may come a "strategic partner." Yeah, right. "Strategic" would be if they actually brought in someone who knew WTF they were doing. This is pure fucking panic. You'd have to think that the Wilpons are looking to score a quarter billion. What kind of jagoff would give these two bananas a quarter billion, only to let them continue to run the team further into the ground? Surely, a quarter billion would at least buy a thunderous slap of Jeff.

Bokolis is speculating that the Wilpons are still sandbagging, and that shit is even worse than they are letting on. I think things will continue to spiral downward on them, eventually forcing them to sell their entire interest in the team. A forced sale to pay creditors isn't necessary, as I don't really give a shit about their personal and financial ruin; I just want them out. That day may very well be fast approaching. It's a shame that so many baseball summers had to be soured in the process.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Same ol', same ol'

Bokolis swept though the conference championship round, even tossing in the under to go with the Packers, with the three wins taking the post-season record to 8-3. Bookies all over nowhere are scratching their heads.

Driving home Sunday from way up north- I may get into that another time- I was stuck listening to New York sports radio incessantly push the Jets to take out the Steelers. Having a slightly sturdier backbone than the politicians who are similarly lobbied and, knowing Jets fans are dumbshits on the level of Philadelphians, I resisted the temptation to switch up to the Jets.

I was in and out of the first game. The game was no fun, as it seemed like Rodgers and the Packers were carrying the Bears like Mayweather carried De La Hoya.

The fuss was about Cutler coming out with a creaky knee. Fellow players violated for twatting about what a chump he is for begging off. As Urlacher said, jealous muthafuckas talk shit cause that's all they're worth. Damned staight, those chumps wish they could've been in the game to get arm tackled by a QB. At least when that DB from Indy was tackled by Ruthlessbuggerer a few years back, the QB was the bigger man and the DB had the excuse of having been stabbed in the leg by his DreamKiller that very week. For fuck's sake, the way Urlacher moves like he has two left feet, you'd never know he used to return punts in college.

Deion Sanders, who, at best, can be considered a pundit at this point, whinged, conveniently forgetting that he couldn't tackle the guy holding the down marker and the games he missed because of turf toe or some shit. I remember thinking that, the way Cutler made his final throw, he's got nothing.

I was no less disappointed that the twatters. Bokolis picked the Packers primarily because of a lack of faith in Cutler. I didn't need some plucky back-up in there moving the team, all of the sudden. The second guy was as useless as Cutler, but the third guy got it going.

It was unsettling watching the Packers gift the Bears the 14 points that they did. It was REALLY unsettling watching the Bears drive down for the tying score, which, after a quick score by both sides, would've wrecked my hedge. Having watched the last five Packers games, they have always gotten the picks when they've needed them. That whole drive, I was wondering when the interception would come.


I immediately picked up that the Jets were not getting tacklers in position against Pittsburgh...not missing tackles as the pundits would have you think. Some people can play defense by letting teams come at them, but they're not known to the socialized world. On the other side of the ball, the Steelers attacked the Jets, getting the jump on them because they seemingly knew the plays. Once they fell behind by 10, you could see that Sanchize was pressing. He was holding the ball longer and, when he did pass, trying to force it in. He got caught out there for 24-0.

24 points had to bee too much. I fell asleep as the Jets were lining up for the field goal that would open their account. Even the chuckle I had to myself- the same ol' Jets, putting me to sleep- couldn't keep me awake, as, after the weekend I had, it was just about bedtime.

Bokolis woke up in the middle of the night to birds playing tennis; not in my room, though, I'm sorry to say. Don't sneer; after Saturday night, slightly less I said, another story. Nonetheless, I expected to wake up to a 27-10 final. When I saw 24-19, I was a little more interested to see what happened. I gather someone called the 2nd half comeback "gallant" or some shit.

It couldn't have been, and the highlights proved it. The Steelers never had to stop the Jets. They didn't even have to field an onsides kick. And...and, when the Jets needed to stop the Steelers on that last drive, twice, they couldn't. That leads me to think that, maybe they mussed up the Steelers' hair a little, but the Jets only got close because the Steelers let them.

So, as the Jets fans tuck their cunts back into their knickers, the real men continue onwards.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Rugby for fairies...2011 Conference Championships

Ummm, yeah, right back down to earth. A crappy 1-3 later, Bokolis is 5-3 for the playoffs. I can't claim any Tom Jackson bullshit, that I was trying to motivate the Jets by picking against them. Actually, the last 40 minutes or so of that game went about as I expected. It's just that I'd expected the Patriots to have had a 21-0 lead by then. The Ravens pissing away that game would have bothered me far more. The Falcons weren't ready for prime time...should have picked up on that...whatevs.

Packers (-3.5) over BEARS - The Packers are everybody's comfortable pick. The only things not comfortable are the wood we have to lay and the fact that the referee was part of the crew that flagged the Packers 18 times in their Week 3 loss to the Bears. The Bears were in garbage time from the second quarter last week. They did everything in their power to help the Seahawks backdoor cover. To pick the Bears is to place faith in Jay Cutler...yeah, right. While we're dicking around, let's also take the under (43.5) as a hedge. If the Bears win, I'm pretty damned sure that it won't be a track meet.

STEELERS (-3.5) over Jets - The Jets fans have their cunts up in the air like never seen. I'd tell them to act like they've been here before, but they haven't, really. This is their fourth AFC championship game and, while all have been on the road, this one has to be the one the fans feel that they have the best chance of winning. They probably had an excellent chance in '82 against a weak Dolphins team. But, the fish management decided to let the rain turn the Orange Bowl into slop, muddling the Jets and resigning them to watching A.J. Duhe run away with the AFC championship (A.J. Duhe, btw, was reputed to be one of the biggest pussies in the history of pussies). They were tough for a half in Denver, but got popped with a bomb right out of the locker room. Even last year, they were right there before Greene was injured. Might they finally break through?

History tells us not so. Bokolis has always said that the price that the Jets (and Chiefs) pay for winning rigged Super Bowls is that they don't get to go back until everybody else gets a turn. As it was, I think they were the last team that was around at the merger to win a division. The Bucs, Panthers, Cardinals and Saints were big hurdles. But, I believe that the only teams that haven't been to one since are the Browns, Lions, Jaguars and Texans. Is Karma going to make the Jets wait around for them?

This time around, the Jets have nothing to avenge. They defeated the Steelers in the regular season, ending their oh-for-ever losing streak in Pittsburgh. The Steelers were without Polamalu and Heath Miller and had some pretty horrid play calling, while the Jets popped the opening kickoff. The Jets have done well improving the ride for themselves coming out of the gate (vs. reg. season) in all of their playoff games under Ryan. I'm thinking that it's the Steelers' turn to make the Jets uncomfortable.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Rugby for fairies...divisional round

4-0, putos. The only thing that can explain it is that I've stayed away from the pundits, which has kept me with a clear head.

On we go to the divisional round. I'm writing this before the pundits get to me, because with fresh snow on the ground, it will be harder to get out and away from the television. Bokolis feels confident about marking so early and would only amend picks in an extraordinary circumstance.

Ravens (+3) over STEELERS - The two regular season games didn't tell you much; two tough matches, the Ravens winning without Ruthlessbuggerer and the Steelers stealing (n/p/i) the game down in Baltimore. I just think the Ravens are a slightly better team than the Steelers, have no qualms about playing on the road, and will find a way to exploit their main advantages, Boldin and Ray Rice, in ways that they didn't during the previous two meetings.

FALCONS (-2.5) over Packers - Had to get this in before it went to 3. As you saw with the BCS game on Monday night, falling right on the number is not fun. Green Bay dominated the Eagles- even had a 100-yard rusher- and still had to fight off a final drive. The Packers are a tough team, but they do not play crisply. Even if they play as well in Atlanta, against a markedly better team than the Eagles, it will be good enough for them to lose a close game.

BEARS (-10) over Seahawks - Just as the Seahawks home field advantage was discounted too much because of their regular season record, their road disadvantage (12PM game out east, which has typically been a disaster for the Seahawks) is being discounted because of their latest performance...though it's not discounted as much as it was when the line opened, as we now have to lay the full 10.

Bokolis is fully aware that the Seahawks defeated the Bears in Chicago this season. But it was before Chicago's bye week, so you can toss that result right out the window. Besides, I have a hazy memory of some unusal events occurring in that game. 9-7 teams can get it together for playoff runs, but I have decidedly less faith in a 7-9 team, especially in Seattle's circumstances. If Cutler can keep from playing like a jagoff, the Bears should smoke the Seahawks.

PATRIOTS (-8.5) over Jets - OOOOoohh!!! The main event. How cheesy was FOX' constant referral to the late Sunday game as the headliner?! Serves them right that it was a dreary game.

These teams split the season series, but the Jets were embarrassed in New England. The two Jets victories over New England under Rex Ryan were the result of the Patriots getting tired of being hit. Without the malaise that accompanied the cancer Moss, the Patriots have dialed up the intensity and have returned to their championship formula of methodical, superb execution. They have torched the league, only stubbing their toe against the Browns, which is a throwaway at this point.

To win this game, the Jets will have to reprise and outdo the tactics that won the game at Indy. Basically, they have to beat the Patriots the way the Giants did in the SB XLII, pound the hell out of them and keep possession for 40 minutes. Unfortunately for the Jets, the Patriots know this is coming and watched the Jets do it to Indy. The Jets are tough and play with heart, so I expect them to fight the good fight...and still lose by over two touchdowns.

Friday, January 7, 2011

Are you ready for some...Rugby for fairies 2011?!

Bokolis is not sure what I learned from this year's NFL regular season. Every time I sit down to watch, something puts me to sleep. Historically, the Jets have been the culprit. But, we've had so many weeks where the Giants or the Jets were not playing on Sunday afternoon that out-of-town teams were regularly dumped on us. All manner of bullshit conspired to put me to sleep.

So, really, the season wasn't that memorable. It was just a bunch of plodding; sometimes certain teams were good, sometimes they weren't. The Bears, Eagles, Jets and Ravens fit this description. The only team that stood out was the Patriots. Others, the Falcons Saints and Steelers, looked like they could do some work on their best day, but weren't always on their best day. The Packers and Colts were too hurt to key us in on what they really have. Similarly, the Chiefs could be a dark horse, or could be the team that lost twice to the Raiders.

So these are your playoff teams. The Seahawks are only involved to piss people off. Two ten win teams are home. Tampa Bay pulled about a half-dozen games out of its ass and can look to build on that, as they will still play a third place schedule next year. The Giants won 10 games without really pulling a game out of their ass and were well beaten- though they had a sniff at stealing the first Eagles game-in 5 out their 6 losses. Fans will point to the meltdown against the Eagles as what did them in, conveniently forgetting that they were smoked against Tennessee and Dallas at home.

Onward we go, in hopes of atoning for last year's disaster.

SEAHAWKS (+10.5) over Saints - There are no match-ups to discuss. The Saints are the defending champs and the Seahawks are in because they play in the NFC West. Nonetheless, I think Seattle's home field advantage has been discounted too much. Putting an indoor team in a raw setting should inject some counterbalance into this game. If the elements can keep the Saints from flying out of the blocks, the Seahawks may stay close enough to keep focus.

Jets (+3) over COLTS - What has changed from last year? The Jets aren't really playing better ball than they were at this time last year, but they can afford more mistakes than last year. Even last year's outfit was ahead at halftime before the injury to the RB scuttled the ship. The Colts are banged up, can't quite move the ball as well as last year and can have the ball moved on them. P. Manning may be the best player on the field, but he is not the overwhelming force. This game is here for the taking.

Ravens (-3) over CHIEFS - I don't think much of Flacco, but I don't think the Chiefs have much to offer. Much has been made about Arrowhead being a tough place to play. The Chiefs were 7-1 at home this year, but they have played NOBODY this year. Am I to believe that they will outperform against relative quality when they didn't look all that impressive against scrubs?

Packers (+2.5) over EAGLES - Will the Packers be able to move and score on the Eagles without having a running game of note? What I'm seeing out of the Eagles is that Vick is allowing himself to get a little full of himself. I don't see the same solid QBing that I saw the first half of the year. He's been sloppy. Not surprisingly, the Eagles went 3-3 in their last six games. Even when you toss out the Vickless finale, the Eagles were behind entering the 4th quarter in the other five. As it turned out, they were a freakish 8 minutes from being the ones out on their asses. I don't believe Vick will be able to dial it back up for the playoffs.


As we approach Sunday's cup tie with the filthy manc cunts, Bokolis will reflect on the state of Liverpool LC. More pointedly, I will examine what it took for us to get to this sorry state, where the fmc are on course to overtake 'Pool with a 19th League while Liverpool are on course to miss out on Europe next season.

Fans often blame the coach when the players look shyte. But, as people call for Hodgson's job, have they not considered that this squad looked shyte from the beginning and was put together by prior regimes? By that rationale, Hodgson must have worked magic when they ran Chelski, especially since Chelski have since gone into a tailspin.

It is the coach's fault when the team always looks awful, even when the team is awful. But, when you have an awful team, blaming the coach is sort of like blaming Obama for running the debt to $14T without regard to how the first $13T was racked up.

Unfortunately, Liverpool is suffering the combined effects of two terrible courses of action. Half of the team was owned by a man dumb enough to buy something from Goerge W Bush. Tom Hicks, having fallen ass-backwards into the Texas real estate boom, together with his partner in bungling, George Gillett, had (a la Fred Wilpon) pressed his luck in the hopes of cashing in on the new stadium payday. When that well dried up, it disastrously affected their ability to bring in top tier talent. The brink of bankrupcy has ousted Hicks and Gillett, at the expense of misfortune and mediocrity.

Of course, that's only half the problem. The other half came in the form of the fat Spanish waiter, Rafa Benitez. Benitez gutted the youth system, failing to develop a single player from within. It was one thing to bring in quality like Luis García and Xavi Alonso. It's another to start bringing in the third tier Riera and Arbeloa and third tier Brazilians Fábio Aurélio and Lucas...that fucking Lucas...he must have been Benitez' mistress or something. They brought him Keane, Benitez shunned him and they sold Keane for 60% of what they bought him after 6 months. They brought Benitez Aquilani- Benitez treated him as though he found out Aquilani was banging Lucas on the side.

Hey, Hodgson isn't the answer (neither is Obama, for that matter). But, like Obama, he didn't create the problems. Moreover, having this team overachieve and get to, say, 6th place would only further delude those who think a top four spot is merely a few tweaks away.

Watching Liverpool pull Champions League victories (Benitez won it in 2005 with Houllier's team) out of the hat while struggling to stay top four in the League (while clinging to its history) pulled the wool over most people's eyes. Bokolis could sense this coming for a few years. As the stadium deal soured, I knew there would be a day of reckoning.

Having never been to Liverpool, I imagine that, at its best, it is sort of like Pittsburgh; at it's worst, Detroit, and can probably be categorized as somewhere between Pittsburgh and Cleveland. All three of those are dying cities, with Pittsburgh having done the best job of re-inventing itself. I feared the team was dying in the same way.

With fuck-ups of this scale, they will be lucky to avoid relegation. The current cycle hasn't even hit rock bottom. Rock bottom will be when Stevie G, who has got about one solid season left in him, which he will surely look to convert into 4 years of salary somewhere else, leaves and no one is there as he was when Macca left and Owen was when Fowler left. Torres - well, he only plays about a half season anyway, what's it matter if he leaves?

So, it doesn't matter who they bring in. Liverpool will be feeling the effects of the mis-management- both by the fat Spanish waiter and the two dumbshits- for at least a few years...and, that assumes the current regime can both rebuild the youth system AND go on a City-esque spending spree to hold over the fans.

What will hold Bokolis over is putting one over on the fmc. As it is, asking what took so long to get to 18 will lose its effect once the fmc get to 19.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Dutch Treat?

Sylvie van der Vaart showing that her old man ain't got shee-yit on her.

video via El Comercio

aside- I guess he's not her "old man," is he? WTF is Rafael van der Vaart doing with a bird 5 years older than he is? Bah, she's doing better than his already washed-up ass...AND she's had to fight off breast cancer.

El Comercio asks its readers, toungue-in-cheek, hopefully, whether this Dutch trick is real or fake? I haven't seen such bad posture on the ball since Desailly was playing for Milan. Moreover, there's no way anyone without proper form on a high-five can juggle a football...none, fuckin' fuggedaboudet.

If they wanted to get a broad to juggle a football in heels, they should've just brought in Poof-naldo and taken the scratch they saved on the CGI to order up a few call girls.