Friday, November 7, 2008

Eventful times

All this shit's been happening. I've been (vainly) trying to find those Baked Tostitos scoops, Halloween, playoff game (crushed those chumps on the first leg) and, uhhh, oh yeah...the nation elected (such as we can; we don't actually vote for President) a bi-racial cat to the Presidency...thass wassup.

Aside - I didn't vote for Obama. Bokolis always votes for himself. Life under Bokolis would be a good ol' time, until someone fucked up. Then, muthafuckas'll be getting executed like a muthafucka.

America has been so quick to suck its own dick for electing a black guy. If racial hang-ups weren't still an issue, nobody would give a fuck. But, like everything else, it's exaggerated and overblown. Obama was raised- in his version of an Army brat upbringing- mostly by white people. He's Ivy League educated and has been around the world like Akinyele and Lisa Stansfield's tour bus. If you turn up the sound and look away- the opposite of what you would do if Joe Buck were speaking- Obama is every other politician. The standard here is Derek Jeter, who is viewed outside of any race. Switch pigmentations on them and nobody would point out Obama's race...and Jeter would be far less clutch and Yankees fans may even acknowledge (to themselves) that he's a shitty fielder.

You know when we'll be past all the bullshit; when we have a stretch where 3 out of 4 Presidents that are something other than white males- they don't even have to be particularly good presidents- and there is no sentiment for a need to get a white guy back in there.

Baby steps, right? If you must focus on looks and/or pigmentation, it's not like Wesley Snipes, or some "real bruhh," (Chuck D?) is president. That's where I want to see y'all. Obama looks like Urkel, talks like The Rock. I can't bullshit; I'm waiting for Obama to pull off a mask and there's Bernie Mac, still alive, yelling, "Here I am, muthafuckas! Here I am!" I could picture Mac, in his twang, going, "...white people walking around, looking at each other (his eyes would be wide-open, looking around, p-noid like some shit was about to jump off), like, 'What the fuck did we just do?' "

Anyway, it only took eight years of the worst president in the history of our country and an ancient lizard, who projected more of the same, for an opponent, with politics' answer to Paris Hilton for a running mate. Putting aside his dogfight with Hillary because either one was going to break a ceiling, if Obama didn't have a good draw, then no one has.

Full credit to him, though. Let's see what ya got, homeboy. I mean, President-elect presumptive Obama. After the past 8 years, if Obama exits to the critique of, same ol' bullshit, it will mean that he will have held his own.

Kids (20-somethings) were out there celebrating like we overthrew the Bush dictatorship. While I think they are blithely naive if they believe real change is coming, I can't say that it was that much of an exaggeration. I thought for sure that the current cabal, when its time was nearing the end, was going to find some way to stay on...pull like a code red on the DHS scale, suspend the Constitution or some shit. There's still time, I guess. But I have to believe that Bush has a countdown clock on his desk and that he can't wait to get back to Crawford and re-hit the bottle. Laura Bush will have to be weaned off Zoloft. No worries, as long as she doesn't drive, we'll be all right.

We have lovely parting gifts for Gov. Palin, as well...a tee shirt, made in some hostile nation, like Africa, that says, "I ran for Vice President and all I got was a stupid wardrobe, which I'm going to return, 'cause I'm no diva." We also have a pair of Love Pink sweat pants, with "DRILL BABY DRILL" stitched into the rear. Farewell, enjoy your fade into bolivian. Give a fist-pound to Quayle. See if he has gotten potatoe worked out.

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