Saturday, April 26, 2008

Are You Ready...

I'll never understand why people piss away an April afternoon on the draft. Actually, there are many people- buffalo wing-eating fat bastards- who treat this day as a holiday. The easy answer is that people are morons, but I'm trying to look deeper.

(err, that image is probably copyright of the NFL or something...if you're going to use it, give the NFL a rusty trombone so we don't get in trouble)

Granted, I'm not terribly into American football. My needle to all is that it's rugby for fairies, realizing that American football is played by fairies and tough men alike. The game itself bores me, probably because there's a break after every play and because most participants have no game. They think they're playing Madden.

As for watching football, it bores the shit out of me. It puts me right to sleep, for which I'm thankful because I need my Sunday nap. Again, there is a style issue, something beyond my perception that watching is for buffalo wing-eating fat bastards. The NFL has too many rules and there are too many technicalities and too much specialization. As I'm always flying under the radar, I'm not much for rules. It's communist. There, I've said it.

In general, watching sports has become increasingly overbearing. Sports programming is packaged to attract new viewers, who don't view sports as do, say, those who care and know enough about sports to blog about sports. This destroys the game for the rest of us.

As it pertains to the NFL, we're subjected to the flawed analysis of uneducated, washed-up jocks, full of malapropisms the way they used to be full of juice. It's always overdone, week in and week out, as the saying goes. Today's draft is like their prom night. Let me know how it turns out. I've got a party to attend, with some more mature women and some more of their friends.

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